When life gives you lemons ...

Clean them up with paper towel. If you don't have paper towel, well ... Toliet paper is paper too?

End of the (school) year!

Lots of little voices singing in French ... I love the end of the year school parties :)

Orange

Last week I went to Orange, France. Yes, there's a city called Orange. It's in the south, and it has one of the oldest outdoor, stone, theaters.

Here's a crappy picture (TOO SUNNY) of a Caesar-like statue lending its commanding presence to the stage ...

We were there for a televised music festival, so the rehearsal was during the day ...

During the performances, the host was sitting in the audience ... Two rows in front of ME. Hahaha.

If you click on this and check it out bigger, you'll notice that people seem to be very brightly dressed. I was beginning to wonder if it had been on purpose, and then I found out it was marked on the tickets. Oops. Still a lot of white though, lameeeee.

Stage view, with some of the ruins that have been restored ...

It was a lot of fun, but I ate something funky the night before we left, and spent a rough morning in trains trying to hold myself together (which I sort of, not totally, managed). Still recovering from the trauma.

Wine rewards!

Oh AND I had an appointment with the bank, and I picked up a brochure about a credit card. It lists the advantages and the points-earning system ... And lists what your points can get you.

"Plane tickets, bottles of wine, car rentals, digital cameras, GPS devices, flat screens ..."

WHAT? MY BONUS POINTS COULD GET ME BOTTLES OF WINE?

Brilliant. Pretty sure that's not an option on my American credit card.

(At the bottom, in the fine print, they have a warning against alcohol abuse. And moderation. Pfft.)

I saw the sign?

The other night Johan had a concert at the Tribunal de Commerce (Business court?), and I offered to be page turner (anything to avoid my own orchestra rehearsal ...). The building must have been really, really old, and it was beautiful. Crazy two-sided, spiraling, fancy staircases, and hallways like this one.

The actual courtroom had an enormous Renaissance tapestry hanging behind where the judge would be sitting (go ahead law student friends, correct my terminology. I'll smack you). Also, fancy, important looking paintings hanging up on the walls. Hope I'm never going to be in there for an actual procedure ...

On my way out of babysitting the other day, I heard something metal jingling on the ground as I went out the monstrously heavy door. When I looked to see what it was, I found this. 'Good luck M.'

I choose to take this as a portent of good-will from the universe (fingers crossed). In actuality, I probably just broke some little girl's heart because she can't find the charm she lost (terrible person).

Rome!

This past weekend (plus Monday, thank you France for giving all major and minor Catholic holidays as BREAKS!) Johan and I went to Rome. It was my first time in Italy, and the first thing I saw when we landed to switch planes in Milan? The Emporio Armani hangar? Is this for real? Can't wait for Paris to open the Christian Dior Terminal ... Not to mention on the flight from Milan to Rome, the in-flight snack was ... Wait for it ... A MINI ICE CREAM. I was probably the happiest non-child on board.

We got there Saturday night, so Sunday we went to see the Forum, the Coliseum, the Pantheon, and like 10 other churches that I can't remember the names of, please excuse my lack of historical knowledge/culture. This was part of a temple in the Forum ruins ... We even saw the ruins of the former home of the Vestal Virgins (it was pretty much a castle) but all I could think of was the Monty Python spoof.

The Coliseum (forgive me, my photo-taking skills are already a bit limited, not to mention in full sun I could barely see the screen of my Blackberry).

Inside the forum. Apparently the floor was wood, so it didn't make it. You're seeing the foundations of the pens for animals and gladiators and you know, the other people that had a tendency to be torn to pieces in front of an audience.

This guy was selling camera stands, so this picture is for my photog-nerd friends (cough Caitlin, Julie, Emma, Chris). What's your job? Oh, you know, just selling camera stands outside the Roman Forum.

Italian Vélib! Although their bike share system looks a little more complicated than the one in Paris ...

Pretty view down the street ...

Invisible man ...

Invisible man who got raptured?

The (real) Pantheon:

The ceiling of the real Pantheon (except not all of it, because it's THAT big).

Another church (I think it's the one from the Place di Navona).

Inside another church (I think this one was the first Jesuit Church, but I could be making all of this up) ... The painting looked 3D, I've never seen anything like it. You would have thought they were all flying out of the ceiling from a certain angle, and even the cuppola was an optical illusion! Only works when you stand in the right place though, obviously.

Sunday we decided to head straight to the Vatican. On our way, I saw this. For the Morrisons (Mommy, can you pass it along?)!

The line to get into the Vatican was UNREAL, so we allowed ourselves to be sucked into a tour group (there are a million people harassing the line saying, "Join a tour, skip the line!") and skipped ahead. This was my first view as we came in (post-security and ugly modern entrance).

My favorite part: Hall of Maps!!!

The Pope's beer pong table?

Even the Pope needs a parking lot.

You can't tell here because the angle was rough and I was already halfway down, but this was the only exit from the Vatican. Talk about douchey ... They were those stupid half steps that are long, so you can't get a rhythm going ... And it spiraled around like 12 times. THANKS.

Afterwards we went to the Pope's favorite hangout, San Pietro, Saint Pierre, Saint Peter ... Whichever you prefer.

The inside was pretty, but at this point I had decided all churches are the same (something I'm willing to stand by, because after awhile it doesn't matter how pretty it is) ...

Then SOMEBODY (cough Johan cough) decided we absolutely had to go to the top of the cuppola. Now, to clarify, I'm not particularly claustrophobic, but there are limits. We first took the elevator up three stories, which puts you onto the roof (behind those statues you can see on the front in the first picture I put up). Then you have to go up a billion seemingly never-ending stairs that twist and wind and at one point (this is where I lost it) force you to lean halfway over to your right, because THE ENTIRE HALLWAY IS SLANTED. Oh, and did I mention that it's just barely wide enough for one not-large person to fit through? So if the people in front of you stop, you're SOL. Probably the only reason I didn't have a heart attack was the fact that even if you have a breakdown, you'd have to finish climbing up to get out (there is no room to get you past the other people to get back down, and it's too narrow for anyone to help you out). The kicker was right at the end (but you don't know it's the end, so it's even worse). The staircase gets the narrowest, and spirals so tightly on itself that instead of a railing to hold on to, there is a rope fixed in place at the top and the bottom, and as you climb up the itty bitty stairs, you basically pull yourself along up the rope.

Seriously?! I don't know who decided to say Heaven is up and Hell is down, but I'd like to have a word with that person. This was no Stairway to Heaven (couldn't resist).

I was so busy being traumatized and trying to breathe normally that I didn't particularly care about the view anymore, but I did have the presence of mind to snap a shot or two before getting out of there, and fast (turns out the way down is way less traumatic).

After all the lines and walking (Rome is HUGE, just to get through the sites is a ton of walking) we were so tired that we went back to the hotel, and then I decided I was done moving. I don't know if I'm just getting old, but I can't remember the last time my legs hurt this much!

In the airport the next morning, I saw this ad, which seemed like the perfect end to the trip ...

(Lin, it's like the shirt you made me !!!)

I had a lot of fun, but it was definitely nice to get back to Paris!

Goofiness

Just some random things I've come across. Etam was selling this shirt when Meg, Gennie and Carolyn were here ... Ingrid Michaelson lyrics?!

In an interior decorating store, GIANT legos. Simon thought these were great, and I'm kind of intrigued as well (at least stepping on these ones would't hurt nearly as much).

Simon's reaction to my ending naptime? Running to his parents bed and no longer speaking to me.